Alphabet Soup: Vague Memories
by Windfighter
Summary: Safe at the quarantine ship Emil's dreams finally return to him, with Lalli waiting in it.


Emil looked at the ceiling above his head. Home, he was home again. It had been a while since he dreamt about his old house. A week, almost two. He used to dream about it almost every day.

"You shouldn't move."

Lalli's voice. Emil tried to sit up but pain shot through his body and he leaned back on the pillows again. He turned his head towards the voice, fought to focus his gaze.

"Your spirit is still weak."

Lalli wasn't even looking at him, busy eating the cake that stood on the table. Emil closed his eyes again.

"The fire..." he whispered.

Lalli stopped moving, no sound came from him. Emil opened his eyes again.

"I used it", Lalli said. "I had to. I had to break the link."

"What..."

Emil tried to sit up again. Lalli turned towards him, moved the chair closer and placed a hand on Emil's shoulder. Emil stopped moving. Dreams were never this painful.

"I don't expect you to understand", Lalli turned away again.

"Am I..." Emil took a shaky breath. "Am I going crazy again? Will your voice haunt me when I wake up?"

"I know the way back now."

Emil tried to remember the last dream with Lalli. It felt so long ago now. There had been voices, so many voices. Ghastly faces outside the window, in the doorways. And then fire everywhere.

"Lalli... _is_ this a dream?"

Lalli froze, then nodded.

"Yes."

Emil had to close his eyes once more, let his head sink deeper into the pillow.

"Magic", Emil muttered. "Magic is real, isn't it?"

"...yes. Stupid."

Emil laughed, then winced. Lalli turned towards him again.

"Next time listen to me."

"Next time, don't pretend I'm crazy."

"There won't be a next time."

"I hope so too."

Silence. Emil listened to the wind dancing past the window, the crackling of fire slowly coming closer, his nanny's step in the kitchen and Lalli's breathing. He forced his eyes open again.

"How are _you_?"

"Fine. Bored."

"I'm glad you woke up again. I was worried. And I..." Emil took a deep breath to gather himself. "I wanted to thank you. For saving me from the giant."

"Which one?"

There was a small smile on Lalli's face. Emil returned the smile then looked at the ceiling again.

"Could you... explain it to me? What happened? Your voice... I wasn't actually crazy, was I?"

The smile faltered again. Lalli turned towards the table.

"It's mage stuff, you won't understand."

"I know, just... tell me anyway."

Lalli let out a sigh, got up from the chair and sank down on the couch next to Emil.

"You really are stupid. What's the use? You'll forget it when you wake up."

"I'll try not to."

Lalli pulled at the blanket, tucked Emil firmer into it. Emil winced as Lalli's hands pressed against him. Lalli pulled away again, pulled at his tunic.

"A part of me ended up with your soul. It made you see spirits. And made them see you. You let them lure you into a trap."

Lalli glared at Emil.

"That was stupid. You're an idiot."

"I know."

"I tried to stop you, but..."

Lalli looked away again.

"You're weak. You fainted. The spirits attacked us here."

Emil remembered the ghastly faces in the window. He could tell Lalli remembered them as well. Lalli had shoved him off the chair, dragged him under the table. Emil had been confused and then the walls caught on fire, Lalli's eyes had been glowing red. The faces fused with the fire, vague shapes had tried to get away from the flames, had moved closer to Emil and Lalli and the fire had followed them.

"I tried to protect us."

There had been something around them, something the flames couldn't pass through, something that glittered with an intense blue light. It had disappeared, their clothes had caught on fire. The pain had been unbearable and then...

"You woke up, but I couldn't talk to you after that."

"I'm sorry..." Emil's eyes closed. "I'll... go to sleep now..."

"You do that..."

Emil was almost asleep, the sounds of the house barely registered in his mind.

"Emil..."

"mm..."

"...I'm sorry too."

Emil blinked against the sharp light, lifted his hand to shield his eyes from the sterile light of the lamps. He sat up, rubbed the sleep from his eyes. There was a dull ache in his body and his head felt heavy. He got up from the bed, leaned against the door.

"...Lalli?" he whispered.

"Stupid."

The voice came from outside his head. He couldn't remember what he had dreamt, he could only remember the slight smile on Lalli's face, but he felt like he understood everything a bit better than he had done the day before. He rested his forehead against the glassdoor.

"Thank you."

His head was starting to feel dizzy again, it had been like that for a while. He sank down on the floor. For over a week he had felt weak and tired and been in constant pain.

"You'll recover", Lalli said. "It'll take a while because you're weak, but you'll recover."

"I'm just glad we're finally safe. No more giants, no more ghosts, no more beast. When we get back to civilization for real I'll become a skald instead."

"Mm..."

"Lalli, is this mage stuff? How we understand each other?"

"Yes."

He could hear the frustration in Lalli's voice, the tiredness.

"Okay. Just wondered."

He could almost hear Lalli's surprise over the lack of questions.

"Oi, the two of you awake now?"

Sigrun waved at Emil from her room. She was grinning widely and Emil waved back, forced himself to smile at her.

"Nine more days then we're off the ship, pretty boy! Happy?"

"Kind of. Happy to see you're feeling better!"

Emil got up from the floor, pain cut through his head, blinded him, made him dizzy and he had to grab the door handle to keep himself from falling down again.

"I'm going to..." He took a couple deep breath, tried to clear his head. "...I'm gonna lie down and read again."

"Urgh, you're so boring!"

"Nine more days in isolation, Sigrun!" Emil forced a laugh. "You better get used to being bored."

He let go of the door handle, waved to Sigrun and flopped down on the bed again. There was a light tapping at the wall and Emil tapped back before he looked at the ceiling. Soon he'd be home again.


End file.
